Q(uarantine) Tips

It appears that a portion of our country has chosen to take the “Independence Day” holiday literally and many have declared their independence by blasting back into society like a teenager with a handful of sparklers. How are you coping with being “grounded?”

-Are you reliving your teenage years by sneaking out of the house and basking in the glory of finally celebrating your independence?

-Are you currently doing your homework and carefully drafting your step-by-step plan for re-entry?

Are you still hiding in your self-imposed quaran-cave, reflecting on what you’ve learned while waiting to see what transpires before making any executive decisions?

We, of course, have had mixed feelings throughout this entire pandemic, some of us chose to dive directly in to the deep end early on while others have decided it was time to proceed cautiously and stick our toe back into the reality pond, one blog post at a time.

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Brooke (60-Something Baby Boomer)

Feeling stressed? Allow me to apply a calming balm to your frazzled emotions. During these peculiar times, people seem to be firmly entrenched in various camps vis-à-vis public deportment. I belong to a less vigilant sect. Some (including some on this very page) would call it reckless, feckless – heardhearted or hardheaded. But it’s keeping me sane in the midst of the shitshow.

So, here is my one tip for surviving the quarantine and subsequent re-entry: IGNORE ALL NEWS COVERAGE. As we’ve seen in recent days, our experts have been back-pedaling faster than a unicycle clown on a tightrope. After weeks of impending doom, we now hear that the dreaded “second wave” might not happen? That stay-at-home orders could cause “irreparable damage”? That the ubiquitous face masks are now “symbolic” rather than prophylactic? What are you supposed to believe? Answer: none of it. Just trust the wisdom within yourself to determine your own way of moving forward in this world and, at the same time, respect that of the other fellow. You’ll be fine, my friend. Just fine.

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Lindsay (Fabulous 40’s)

I have realized while surviving my time in quarantine I have learned some things that should remain in practice, for all time, even after my official re-entry! My best practices:

-Impactful, inspiring, anxiety relieving, causing giddy laughter, and a great night sleep all describe my #1 new best practice – shots of tequila! Pass the salt and lime please!

-Virtual Friday Happy Hour – yes please. It has been the best start to the weekend. I am forced to finish work at a decent hour, so I can “pretty” up for my camera time. Virtual happy hour does not require real pants, ironing, hair styling or an Uber.

-For all video meetings and chats, sit slightly sideways to limit the view of the excessive roots growing out. Why continue after….I like the slight aloofness of it.

-Finally, embrace it!! Embrace the peace, embrace not having to constantly be somewhere, enjoy reduced laundry, appreciate showering being optional, and stop and smell the roses because even during quarantine….they are still in bloom.

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Amanda (30-Something Millennial

I will continue to get by with a little help from my friends…virtually.

-Zoom workouts hold me accountable and give me some routine/purpose. Turn off the camera during live classes and there are no worries of anyone seeing you do an exercise incorrectly or needing a break. Heck, I even tried a dance class – who am I? I am not the next J Lo.

-Facetime Happy Hour is my favorite. Boozing without ever leaving my couch? Sharing a drink and laughs with friends that are out of town more regularly? Heavy handed wine pours? Count me in! Can this remain a thing post-pandemic?

-Screen fatigue is real. After webex-ing all day during work, sometimes you don’t want to Zoom your night away. So don’t and appreciate the joy of not having to be anywhere with anyone. No FOMO here.

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Karen (F’ing Fifties)

I have yet to venture into the great outdoors but it’s not entirely due to the pandemic or complete lack of human decency that is stopping me, it is something much more concerning, it’s the Great Karen Debate. Now that my name has transformed from the standard synonym for the quintessential “basic bitch” to the more mainstream, problematic heathen, I haven’t quite figured out how to proceed into this new society with such a cloud (and tremendous responsibility) hanging over my head.

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It’s hard enough to remember that I now have to brush my hair and put on pants, do I also have to legally change my name before stepping out into this new world? Do I cut my hair, put on a permanent scowl (along with my mom jeans) and embrace it? What happened to Jan, did she get promoted? I guess I need to go ask the manager . . .

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Have you executed your Re-Entry Plan?

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8 thoughts on “Q(uarantine) Tips

  1. rehobothquilter July 12, 2020 — 8:39 am

    I’m with Janet, who responded with it depends on how old she is. Since I am already old, and not knowing how long this will continue, perhaps I should purchase a walker now and apply for a handicap sticker for the car. Who am I kidding, I may not even be driving by then, and probably wouldn’t remember how anyway. Until then, I will continue to only go to the grocery store and to pick up prescriptions. And that’s another question…why can’t they all expire together and I could make one trip to pick them all up at the same time. That way I can hang the bag on my walker and try to remember where I parked the car!

    1. Well, I say put some tennis balls on the bottom of that walker and hook it up to a wagon because I may be right there with ya (and I’ll most likely need a ride)!

  2. “Just trust the wisdom within yourself to determine your own way of moving forward in this world and, at the same time, respect that of the other fellow.”

    Love that statement from Brooke. Couldn’t have said it better. As for me, I have no re-entry plan. As a mater of fact, I stay in my house 98% of the time and the remaining 2% are spent running to the store and returning home quickly. I never knew staying at home and 100% telework could be fun and relaxing. I hope my job does not call me back to the office soon. Lol!

    1. I may not totally agree with Brooke on this topic, but her above statement certainly packs a punch, if only everybody could abide by her wise words, we might begin to move forward. In the meantime, I’ll be in my house hoping I, too, can continue to work from home!

  3. Great point, please wake me up when this is over!

  4. My re-entry plan depends on how old I’ll be when it finally happens!

  5. Thank you for providing some light hearted (and educational) reading during this disastrous time. I, for one, was not aware that the coronavirus couldn’t spread sideways and my future is suddenly much brighter! I’m kidding, of course. Stay safe and thanks for the laughs.

    1. Thanks, Chris! You may have just inspired our next topic “How Not To Be A CovIDIOT”

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